Ask and You Shall Receive
“Ask and you shall receive,” is a phrase I’ve been told many times in my life — mostly with a sarcastic tone. This week was no different.
If you’ll recall last week’s Activists vs. Agriculture column, you’ll see that I was, essentially, complaining that agricultural organizations weren’t using money given to them by their members to better market agriculture. I also recalled, in great detail, Dodge’s 2013 Super Bowl commercial, “So God Made a Farmer,” and insinuated that maybe our ag organizations should purchase a Super Bowl ad as well.
Well, in the spirit of asking and receiving, I (along with every other agriculturist in the U.S.) was given that commercial I wanted so badly.
On Super Bowl Sunday, the Center for Consumer Freedom (CCF) released a commercial advocating against alternative proteins or “fake meat.”
The scene is set at a spelling bee and the spelling bee pronouncer asked the contestant to spell the word “methylcellulose.” The contestant looked confused at the rather large word (a $5 word, as my mom would call it) and asked the pronouncer to define it.
“Methylcellulose — it’s a chemical laxative that is also used in synthetic meat,” the pronouncer said. The contestant attempted to spell the word and sadly failed.
The next contestant was given another difficult word that this reporter had to double check her spelling on: propylene glycol. The contestant tried to pronounce the word and then asked, “what’s that?”
“Propylene glycol,” the pronouncer said, “it’s a chemical used in anti-freeze and synthetic meats.”
The commercial cut to images of fake meat with their ingredients rolling across the screen. A narrator began to speak.
“You might need a Ph.D. to understand what’s in synthetic meat,” the narrator said. “Fake bacon and burgers can have dozens of chemical ingredients. If you can’t spell it or pronounce it, maybe you shouldn’t be eating it.” The narrator then urged viewers to go to cleanfoodfacts.com.
The commercial ended with one last contestant who happily said, “Bacon. B-A-C-O-N,” and smiled at the camera.
This commercial was broadcasted to a specific geographical market in Washington D.C. and has been viewed 33,729 times on YouTube.
“CCF believes as more consumers learn what’s in meat analogues, interest will wane,” CCF Media Associate Niko Davis said.
According to CCF a press release, plant-based meats are ultra-processed foods, which the National Institute of Health said may cause overeating and weight gain.
“Despite the perceived ‘health halo,’ synthetic meats are a long way off from being a magical mixture of vegetables. If you’re looking for a healthy snack, you can do better than these industrial foodlike substances,” CCF Managing Director Will Coggin said.
Aside from this specific commercial, CCF’s campaign has been featured in The New York Times, The Washington Post, and the Wall Street Journal.
You mean to tell me an organization spent cold hard cash to market agriculture to non-agriculturists? In the words of Bill S. Preston, Esq. “Excellent.”
As a retaliation, Impossible Foods released a similar commercial where the spelling bee pronouncer (played by Impossible Foods CEO Pat Brown) asks the contestant to spell the word “poop.” The contestant looked grossed out and Brown began to “define” the word.
“Poop. The stinky brown stuff that comes out of your butt. Poop is a mixture of incompletely digested food and billions of bacteria expelled from the bowels of animals. There’s lots of poop in the places where pigs and cows and chickens are killed and chopped to bits to make meat. And there’s poop in the ground beef we make from cows. Poop.”
The contestant spelled the word correctly and a narrator made the following statement: “In 2015, Consumer Reports tested 300 samples of ground beef. They discovered that all of it, including grass fed and organic ground beef contained fecal bacteria. Just because a kid can spell ‘poop,’ doesn’t mean you or your kids should be eating it.”
Impossible’s video was also released on Super Bowl Sunday and so has received 9,417 YouTube views as of press time — it had received less than 2,000 views 12 hours ago.
I would assume that Impossible’s team of scientists would’ve corrected them before releasing this video — but nope, they didn’t. There is a difference between fecal matter and fecal bacteria. Fecal bacteria is on anything and everything.
Eric Mittenthal of the North American Meat Institute said it as best as I could, “What Consumer Reports found were bacteria that are commonly found in the environment, so it is no surprise to find them in beef, blueberries, anywhere else in a grocery store, or on your computer keyboard or phone. That doesn’t mean there’s fecal matter on your phone, just that bacteria that once originated in a gastrointestinal tract is there. Simply put, they are different. For media to claim otherwise is simply inaccurate and misleading.”
To read more on this specific topic, read “Don’t Flush the Facts, Or That Burger” on the front page of this week’s Western Ag Reporter. Or, to get a more detailed account and debunking of these claims, check out “Is There Fecal Matter In Your Hamburger?” by Nebraska Extension Educator Lindsay Chinchester for Beef2Live.
My two cents:
I applaud the CCF for their efforts. I think the commercial was witty and attention grabbing. I wish it could have been broadcasted on every television station in the U.S. so more people would realize just how unhealthy synthetic meats are.
I encourage other ag advocacy organizations to follow CCF’s lead and put forth more effort into marketing the ag industry to non-agriculturists.
And my opinion on the Impossible video? Well, to quote Pat Brown, it’s full of “Poop. The stinky brown stuff that comes out of your butt.”
Photo by Dale Robinette via People Magazine
